I have so much time to kill now. It's ridiculous. What do people do when they don't smoke anything? Last night I read like...a third of a book. That's a lot. This is a book that I've been trying to read but keep getting interrupted. So, I just sat there, and read it. Not all of it, I still have another third to go, but ya know, that's more reading in one night than I'd managed to achieve in at least a month.
Tonight I'm going to take Annie for a run. SO much pent up energy. And I hurt. And I once heard, that exercise is good for cramps, and seeing as I can't use my regular pain relief, I may as give this exercise crap a crack. I really timed things well. I guess, if I couldn't do it now, I wouldn't have been able to do it at any other point, like, I may as well do it when it's tricky, than try when it's supposedly easy.
Work is kinda lame today. He's being funny. I'm not sure if he actually is or not. I knew this would be a potential issue. I was warned right at the start, he wasn't being cold, he just, yeah. And I understand that, but at the same time I don't think there's enough open dialogue between us to really know where things are at. I'm pretty much an open book. I don't know if he is because I don't know what questions would get me the answers I want. OW! I remember why I hate bleeding. Damn. I really need to go to the doctors. I should get myself some hayfever stuff before I leave the country. I really need to get more pills too. I could just go to FPA, but then hayfever...what if I get really bad hayfever in Japan? I have no idea if the flora is going to set me off. But if I go to FPA I can get an STI test, which I should probably have done, just to know I'm all good, even though I'm pretty sure I am. I should be. I'd rather be safe than sorry though. I wonder if I need a smear too...I normally get them at the same time because if they're sticking the pelican up there I may as well have them scrape a little more of my wall and get the whole shibang. Maybe I'll just do that. And buy some hayfever stuff separately. Yeah. I'll do that. It'll be rad.
I can't stop using the word rad. I just can't. I need it. It makes me whole. Complete. Entire. I don't need a relationship, I have rad to make everything alright. It'll spoon me at night. It won't leave me waiting in the cold. It won't say it wants to do something with me and then bail at the last minute. Yeah, me and rad, we go way back.
I didn't get much sleep last night. Again. It's rough. I need some sleep. Some proper sleep. The problem is that there's the non smoking electricity running through my veins, I think it's called oxygen which was previously carbon monoxide. Anyway. I'm so tired, yet incapable of sleep, because my body isn't tired enough. But it should be, because like, yesterday, I got up, did some skipping, went for a walk every break I had, went to pole dancing after work...that should be heaps. That's at least 2 hours of light to moderate exercise. That's more than some people do in a week. Admittedly, I normally get at least 30 minutes exercise a day, because I have sexual frustration issues that can't be addressed so I have to exercise it out. I think the no weed thing isn't helping the sleep.
Today, I've already danced like a spaz for 20 minutes(I tried skipping inside cos I wanted music but there were too many obstacles and I wasn't getting any skipping done and figured jumping around erratically is probably just as, if not more, effective. I just don't have a calorie counter to tell me I've burnt 100 calories, or how many skips I've done, or how long I've been doing it for. THis information is must be mostly incorrect because I'm not sure how it accounts for whipping yourself, or things like that. Also, it takes me much longer than just under 9 minutes. My dancing included power squats. What makes a squat powerful you ask? Well...tip toes. I can't explain it any further than that. I've decided I'm going to learn how to do the splits. It's a long term goal. I don't think it's going to happen this year even, but it will happen. Also today, I've walked for at like, 35 minutes. Because each break, I'm like "ARGH! I WANT A CIGARETTE!" But I can't, so I walk instead.
Okay. I'm gonna read some book and stop boring you with talk about exercise and how much I want to smoke. I'[m going to join in the office conversation. And then read the book. I'M GOING TO FINISH IT IN THE NEXT 2 DAYS!
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